Mmmmmmm... After four months on the road, in the confined space of a safari truck, in close proximity of everyone else at all times for the sake of security, survival and inter-dependency, the question has to be asked: Is it working? Are we coping?
What happens when you throw together fifteen people from every corner of the world, every walk of life, every level of education, age, life-experience, every level of maturity, independence, confidence, values and morality. Not only throw them together, but put them in a situation where survival is the main daily occupation and where the only common denominator is a desire to travel -- which is actually not even a common denominator as everybody's desire to travel is motivated by a different reason.
One cannot ask this question without having Maslow's pyramid jump to mind!
The most fundamental and basic four layers of the pyramid contain what Maslow called "deficiency needs" or "d-needs": esteem , friendship and love, security, and physical needs. With the exception of the most fundamental (physiological) needs, if these "deficiency needs" are not met, the body gives no physical indication but the individual feels anxious and tense. Maslow's theory suggests that the most basic level of needs must be met before the individual will strongly desire (or focus motivation upon) the secondary or higher level needs.
The top level is where we all strive to be. In that aim civilisations have developed and grown, parents work hard to earn enough to pay for the best education for their children, we read and learn and debate and stimulate our minds. We do what we can to achieve our individual potential, we pursue talent, creativity and fulfilment. “What a man can be, he must be.” This forms the basis of the perceived need for self-actualization and so this level of need pertains to what a person's full potential is and realizing that potential. Maslow describes this desire as the desire to become everything that one is capable of becoming
When I look at our group, it is not hard to see that when we started the expedition almost every individual in the group was at least at the second highest level of the pyramid -- or, if not actually there, well on their way to reaching that level; - the level where they had strong self-esteem and had enjoyed their fair share of esteem from others; the level where they were self-confident, gave and received respect from others and had experienced the need to be an unique individual. At worst, everyone, bar one or two, had been well-established in the middle level - the level of belonging, where they had a sense of connectivity with their family; friends and community, where they had experienced love and affection and the sense of belonging to a group.
According to Maslow, the more unstable and unknown our circumstances become, we go right back to the bottom level - the physiological needs - probably to go make sure our foundations -- our very basic physical needs are met first, and as a result we disregard our intellectual needs and our need for indivual achieve,ent and self-actualisation.
When I look at our group -- our little Trans Family, it is easy to point out the indivuals who are clawing to stay at that top level or even the second level of the pyramid. You would also expect us all to be in the middle level where we feel a sense of belonging to a group -- after all, that is the logical assumption when being part of a group is the very essential of a trip like this. But it is not what has happened -- the difference of the individuals has made the group quite a disparate one. And yet, it is unfortunate that in our case and in the environment we find ourselves and the nature of our expedition, the group dynamics dictate that the common denominator is at the foundation level of our pyramid - never at the highest peak. And if you want to survive in a group, you need to go to the common denominator. We are concerned about our food, our water, our sleep, our physical needs, our lives. It is so much easier to stay at that level and not worry about any other.
If the question is 'are we coping?', then the response has to be 'some better than others'. Ironically it is the ones whose natural milieu is the top or second level of the pyramid who manage to cope the best - because they have the confidence and the skills to do so, but at the same time, who are not coping at all -- due to the fact that they are no longer comfortable with being constantly at the lower level and they so long for self-actualisation and that sense of morality and purpose and achieving personal potential.
Does that make sense? Or have we been spending too much time fighting for survival to even remember how to present a little food for thought or a topic for debate? Let me know what you think!
The most fundamental and basic four layers of the pyramid contain what Maslow called "deficiency needs" or "d-needs": esteem , friendship and love, security, and physical needs. With the exception of the most fundamental (physiological) needs, if these "deficiency needs" are not met, the body gives no physical indication but the individual feels anxious and tense. Maslow's theory suggests that the most basic level of needs must be met before the individual will strongly desire (or focus motivation upon) the secondary or higher level needs.
The top level is where we all strive to be. In that aim civilisations have developed and grown, parents work hard to earn enough to pay for the best education for their children, we read and learn and debate and stimulate our minds. We do what we can to achieve our individual potential, we pursue talent, creativity and fulfilment. “What a man can be, he must be.” This forms the basis of the perceived need for self-actualization and so this level of need pertains to what a person's full potential is and realizing that potential. Maslow describes this desire as the desire to become everything that one is capable of becoming
When I look at our group, it is not hard to see that when we started the expedition almost every individual in the group was at least at the second highest level of the pyramid -- or, if not actually there, well on their way to reaching that level; - the level where they had strong self-esteem and had enjoyed their fair share of esteem from others; the level where they were self-confident, gave and received respect from others and had experienced the need to be an unique individual. At worst, everyone, bar one or two, had been well-established in the middle level - the level of belonging, where they had a sense of connectivity with their family; friends and community, where they had experienced love and affection and the sense of belonging to a group.
According to Maslow, the more unstable and unknown our circumstances become, we go right back to the bottom level - the physiological needs - probably to go make sure our foundations -- our very basic physical needs are met first, and as a result we disregard our intellectual needs and our need for indivual achieve,ent and self-actualisation.
When I look at our group -- our little Trans Family, it is easy to point out the indivuals who are clawing to stay at that top level or even the second level of the pyramid. You would also expect us all to be in the middle level where we feel a sense of belonging to a group -- after all, that is the logical assumption when being part of a group is the very essential of a trip like this. But it is not what has happened -- the difference of the individuals has made the group quite a disparate one. And yet, it is unfortunate that in our case and in the environment we find ourselves and the nature of our expedition, the group dynamics dictate that the common denominator is at the foundation level of our pyramid - never at the highest peak. And if you want to survive in a group, you need to go to the common denominator. We are concerned about our food, our water, our sleep, our physical needs, our lives. It is so much easier to stay at that level and not worry about any other.
If the question is 'are we coping?', then the response has to be 'some better than others'. Ironically it is the ones whose natural milieu is the top or second level of the pyramid who manage to cope the best - because they have the confidence and the skills to do so, but at the same time, who are not coping at all -- due to the fact that they are no longer comfortable with being constantly at the lower level and they so long for self-actualisation and that sense of morality and purpose and achieving personal potential.
(Is that why we throw such amazing themed dress-up parties perhaps? Such as the latest one -- Suzanne's birthday party which was an ABC party -- Anything But Clothes and where everyone excelled themselves with innovativeness and creativity.)
Does that make sense? Or have we been spending too much time fighting for survival to even remember how to present a little food for thought or a topic for debate? Let me know what you think!
Dear Wilna - I am sure, like me, every parent on this trip is blessing you for your wonderful, informative, tolerant and beautifully illustrated blog. What a delight for me to find this today - thank you all for making it such a happy birthday for Suzanne.
ReplyDeleteTamsin - SM (Suzanne's mum)
Tamsin -- a pleasure! My three children did this same trip back in 2002-2003 and at the time there were no mobile phones or internet cafes or blogs or emails -- so I can appreciate your note! I must admit that often as I write I think of the parents of all these youngsters, knowing that they don't write too often or stay in touch anywhere near as much as a parent would wish!
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